Letters from Caro

Little did the butterfly know, that after leaving the safety of the cocoon and preparing to unfold its wings, the first beat of its new colourful acquisition would reverberate to the very core of its world.

Sometimes, it’s during your highest moments that you realize how low you have been before and you’d do anything to keep away from the edge.

I don’t know what exactly changed, it suddenly just “clicked”. Maybe it was a new beginning dawning upon me –  it was not an attempt to fully recreate myself but to live vigorously based on newly acquired knowledge, because ignorant is the one who remains inactive against their better knowledge. Maybe all I needed was some time alone to reflect upon that knowledge. Maybe it was the fresh air, a breeze of inspiration and hopeful anticipation of a new chapter, I could write on my own. I experienced a sudden influx of words and a fierce urge to write as if a soulful voice was desperate to express itself. Maybe it was self love emerging from the shadows of a painful past and unfulfilled desires. Maybe it was me finally understanding the lifestyle, I so much desired and how to pursue it in a place so different from where I had encountered it. Maybe I was tired of lying to myself, of making excuses and the recurrent echo of “I’ll start tomorrow”. Maybe it was setting new standards and a strong determination to abide by them. Maybe I was tired of settling for less than I am capable of, maybe I finally saw my worth and the value I could bring to the world by just painting ONE smile on a person’s face. Maybe I recognized, that there is something bigger than myself, something more important than my little world of worries and sorrow I could add value to – I didn’t matter and at the same time, I was all that mattered. Maybe I opened up to the well of endless possibilities and opportunities the world has to offer. Maybe it was a mending broken heart recomposing itself into a wiser version. Maybe it was the mind finally unwinding and finding peace in discomfort. Maybe I suddenly found satisfaction in who I am, accepting the me at this very moment and seeing all facets of the human BEING I am. Maybe it was me embracing all that is “I” and all that is “YOU”, reassessing who I want to be and finally making a move. Because everything I was looking for, is already within. Despite changing colours like a chameleon, at the core it’s still me.

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